Despite having a big Heaven hangover Frère Jack went to Trafalgar Square to look at the homophobic group who call themselves “La Manif Pour Tous” and to support the gay rights counter-protest…
While most families spent their Sunday afternoon relaxing and having some quality time at home, some people decided to wake up early and force their kids to protest in the freezing cold for three hours against gay rights today…
It was shocking, and reminiscent of the horrible Nazi youth scene in Cabaret in which children start singing “Tomorrow Belongs To Me”. About twenty young children were made to stand on the base of Nelson’s Column and shout anti-gay chants while holding placards they couldn’t even read.
Statistically, some of these children will grow up to be gay. God help them, their parents are insane! My parents are heterosexual but they would never have subjugated me to a political protest. Usually when we went on day trips to London my parents would take me to a gallery, or a museum and perhaps a trip to Hamleys if I was lucky!
However. London were not ready to take this crazy group “La Manif” lying down. Hours before they even arrived, a rainbow flag had been installed on the North terrace, and a counter-protest began…
Londoners raised their own home-made placards effectively telling La Manif to fuck right off…
Despite La Manif’’s insisting “we are not homophobic – we just don’t believe that gay couples should be allowed to marry” (??) It was obvious to most present that this group are a big bunch of gay-haters.
This very simple sign said it all for me:
The gay rights activists present had a fun time and saw the humour in the situation. The thing is, England likes the idea of gay marriage, and we’re going to have it very soon. So La Manif were basically wasting their time. And ours. But it was important for us to show La Manif that London’s gay community will always stand up for their city and their rights.
Below here Jen and Alex pose for TÊTU’s camera:
Things got quite exciting when a gay rights activist stormed onto Nelson’s Column and flashed her tits to the entire crowd, joining the child cast of La Manif, and shouting her support for gay equality…
Bizarrely none of the La Manif parents intervened and took their small children away from the scene.
I met up with the activist afterwards, her name is Eliza Guroya. You can follow her on Twitter. Here we are together…
The counter-protest group began to move into the La Manif protest under a giant rainbow flag, Roman invasion style. Apart from there was lots of smiles…
Meanwhile my friend Dylan and I decided to walk around Trafalgar Square giving out some virtual awards. Here they are:
THE AWARD FOR HOTTEST HOMOPHOBE
Never a tough contest. Our eyes caught a glimpse of this cutie holding a La Manif flag pole in the crowd…
Strangely he was wearing a woolie hat with the Norwegian flag on it. Norway was of course the first Scandinavian country to legalise gay marriage, and the sixth country in the entire world I believe. So – bad choice of hat boy! He refused to look directly into the camera and he also refused my offer to take him for a drink after the protest, but I did manage to take this hot snap:
THE AWARD FOR MOST FABULOUS HOMOPHOBE
Well this was difficult, so many fur hats and sunglasses to choose from. This woman was the best though. It’s such a shame she hates the gays because we totally love her:
The runner-up for most fabulous homophobe was this lady clutching a symbolic piece of an indoor plant…
We also loved these three old homophobic ladies who kept dropping their La Manif pamphlets. They had a right old giggle about it. They just couldn’t get their homophobia together in time…
…Oh well, better luck next time ladies! Oh no wait – there won’t be a next time! Well I hope they find a new hobby, and one that they’re better at.
THE AWARD FOR BEST COUPLE
Well there were lots of sweet gay couples who gave up their well-earnt Sunday afternoon to come and stand up for their rights. My favourite couple though was Simon and Bryanne from Ealing who have been together for twenty-six years:
That’s a lot longer than most of the straight couples who turned up today. When it emerged that one of the La Manif’s main speakers was actually divorced, Bryanne had good fun leading the chant “WHERE’S YOUR WIFE? WHERE’S YOUR WIFE?” Classic.
MOST ICONIC PROTESTER
Several London scene icons turned out to support gay rights and tell La Manif to go home, but my favourite had to be Al Pillay…
She’s a great performer with a cult following. Not usually wrapped up for winter, you must take a look at her website. She usually looks like this:
Al had a great time joining in with the anti-Manif chants, which included “BON VOYAGE! BON VOYAGE”, “EQUAL RIGHTS” and the occasional “Oh fuck off you lot!”
Generally speaking, although I am of course biased, the gay rights supporters in the counter-protest were much more attractive, happy and healthy looking than La Manif’s sad old lot. Here are two young activists who came out to give La Manif the middle finger…
Talking of the middle finger, here’s a funny story from this afternoon, this La Manif member started mouthing off at some gay people…
So this bearded gay man went up to him and shoved his wedding ring finger in the homophobe’s face and yelled “THIS IS MY WEDDING RING FINGER”. And then he stuck his middle finger up at the homophobe and yelled “AND THIS IS MY FINGER FOR YOU!”
The homophobe didn’t take it too well, but the police soon marched him off to loony land on the other side of the square…
Talking of loonies. This guy was one of the worst:
His name is Alan Craig and he was one of the La Manif ring leaders. According to him “two men cannot be naturally intimate and consume one another by an activity”. Sorry to break the news to you Alan – but you’re wrong, and I can send you some video links if you like.
He also went on about how “David Cameron has bananas in his ears. He is not listening to us. The government are not listening to us”.
Er… yes they are. We’re represented by our MPs, who we vote in, and they passed the gay marriage bill! *Pulls hair out*
This guy was scary too:
His tone of voice was simply frightening, definitely Nazi-like, and he rambled on about how we’re all made of X and Y chromosomes. Why can’t homophobes understand this? Yes, we are born of a sperm and an egg, but that doesn’t mean gay people can’t get married!! That doesn’t mean infertile people can’t get married. That doesn’t mean straight people should be necessarily encouraged to get married. Get it into your thick skulls! Apples and Oranges.
He said gay marriage would put the future of the human race in danger. Er – EARTH CALLING LA MANIF – the earth’s population is spiralling exponentially out of control. There will be a next generation, straight people will still continue to have 3, 4, 5 and six children. What a prick. And SPOILER ALERT – gay people can have children too.
This guy was a particularly massive prick:
According to him if gay marriage is legalised then “marriage will no longer be marriage”. Er… you’re wrong again there. It will still be marriage, but gay people will be allowed to do it too. It’s a development of marriage for the better. Societies and cultures evolve, like Google Chrome or Pokemon.
A GAY RIGHTS VICTORY:
Ultimately, La Manif did their best to have a loud miserable day of ranting things that didn’t really make sense. But most of Trafalgar Square was empty. La Manif’s numbers were embarrassingly small. The counter-protest wasn’t that big either, but that’s because most gay people in London have already put this debate to rest. Gay marriage is coming!
It was nice to see so many students and young gay rights activists like Eliza and this student photographer called Tom who is still at school:
If anything, La Manif did a good job of riling the gay community enough to re-politicize a young generation of gay people who were in danger of becoming apathetic about their human rights. So thanks for that La Manif.
Frère Jack hopes that everyone in La Manif has a safe journey home. I don’t think I’ll be inviting any of you to my gay wedding in the future, and I also think your parenting skills are questionable having seen the freezing cold tears on your children’s faces today. Those of you whose children are gay – I hope you find it in you to update your social attitudes.
Thanks to all the counter-protesters today, both gay people and our straight allies. It was a fun afternoon. La Manif have already lost their vitriolic battle.
You can follow me on Twitter @jackcullenuk
Right. That’s enough of this now. I’m off to a cabaret show. None other than Jonny Woo and the Gay Bingo Trinity. Some of us have lives to lead.
Frère Jack xx
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